Zoe thinks it’s fascinating how my body is morphing. She hugs and pats my belly, pokes me in my enlarged chest, and all-around treats my body like a freak show in an amusement park.

Last night while I was tucking her in, she said, “Why are your arms getting bigger?”

“Uh-oh, my arms are getting bigger?”

“Yeah, look,” she said, squeezing them, “they are squishier.”

“Oh great. That shouldn’t be happening,” I said, making a mental note to beef up the yoga routines.

“Is there milk in your arms, too?” she asked, still squeezing my arms, much like one would milk a cow.

“No, honey. There’s no milk in my arms.”

“How does milk get into your boobs?”

“Ummm, I don’t really know. There are glands in there that make it somehow. But I don’t know how. Bodies are very scientific.”

“Cuz that would be good if you had milk in your arms, too. Then when the milk in your boobs runs out, you could just squeeze your arms and the milk would go up your arms and back down into your boobs.” And here she traces the path up my arms and over my shoulders and back down to my chest. Where she does a solid poke with her finger.

“Yeah, ummm, that would be a cool trick.”

“So why doesn’t that happen?”

“I just don’t know.”

She sighed and dropped my squishy arm. “Man, bodies really are very scientific.”

It’s an upgrade to think about:

lactating biceps = reserve tank

2 Comments »

1. Science is hard. I probably would have answered “Yes, yes there is milk in my arms making them squishy.” The alternative is kind of depressing [more yoga].

   Comment by stephanie (bad mom) — August 9, 2008 @ 9:42 pm

2. Julia is one that does the poking and patting. Even now that I’m not pregnant. “Your tummy is so big and squishy. Is there another baby in there?” she asks. And I’m all, “My body belongs to me, Julia! Stop jiggling my belly!”

   Eh, kids.

   Comment by Leslie — August 10, 2008 @ 8:03 pm

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